Wisdom Teeth and a sighting...

Yea I know it's been a while since my last entry but whatever. So lets see, I got my wisdom teeth pulled so I'm still recovering from that. I apparently have something called "Dry Socket" which means the hole didn't cover completly so now I have an exposed nerve and it hurts really bad. I will be ordering my Mac Mini sometime towards to middle or end of August. After about two days of budgeting and planning I figured I will have enough to buy the middle version of the mini. I got to play piano for Lili over in Crumely the other day which was awesome. The reason I started to learn piano was so I could play for people so whenever I get the chance to play for someone I take it. Joseph from work has moved in with me temporarily. He didn't have a place to stay and I didn't want him living in his van for a few weeks, so I offered him our empty room. Our cat got hit by a car last weekend so today we got a new one. Its a cute little kitten and I'm sure we will have tons of "fun" with this one. No name has been picked yet but I'm leaning towards Mega Man. On a minor note, I went to a small get together of friends tonight where my lovely ex girlfriend was there. Luckily Brendan didn't want to stay long so I left with him after about 30min of making happy talk. It doesn't bother me that she was there, just more annoying I suppose, but you deal with it and move on....whatever. I've been seeing more of Travis lately which is kinda cool. Since he isn't to wound up in his classes this semester he has more time to hang out. We usualy just watch a movie or go get some food but hey, thats what I miss doing ya know? Just hanging out late at night and talking about things. We were always really good at that when we lived in Bruce. I went to Beth Maries tonight to go see Lili and Amber. Since I dont eat ice cream I just got cookies and a water. I'm probably the only person they know who will go to an Ice Cream parlor and not ever get ice cream. Work still sucks. Life is better than I thought it was. School is coming soon. I miss my family. Oh Brandon got married last weekend and I caught the garder....again. I wasn't surprised that I caught it but I think Brandon was. You know most guys who catch it are like crap, i dont want a chick but I'm like, damn it I've caught this 5 times in my life and I'm still fucking single! I guess thats irony for you though. Well alright, time to go watch Brendan kill some people on battlefield 2.

A long talk with the wise Brothers

So this weekend I went home and finally got to see both of my brothers at the same time! We saw Willy Wonka and the best part was that I actualy got Nicholas to come up here and hang out with me in Khmara!! WOO HOO! Finally after me sitting in there day after day and listening to all the old guys talk about my brother and ask when he is coming back, I got him in there for coffee. It was certainly a fun time. We just sat and talked for over an hour like we normally do about all kinds of stuff. Ok ok....mostly about music and girls. But come on, what else are we going to talk about? We are two young adult guys, is there anything else to talk about?? Nicholas also got a car this weekend which means he SHOULD be able to come up here and hang out sometime. He needs to get his guitar gear up here and we are gonna rock out hard core style. Man its been years since the last time we jammed and I miss it greatly. I mean playing with my band is awesome dont get me wrong, but its my bother, and there is nothing like rocking out with your brother. So until we meet again bro, keep rocking out and my drums are waiting for you.

Still Fighting It - Ben Folds

Everybody knows, it hurts to grow up, and everybody does.

its so weird to be back here, well let me tell you what,

the years go on and we're still fighting it, we're still fighting it.

FUCK FUCK FUCK

I WILL NOT LET HER RUN MY LIFE! I WILL NOT LET HER CONTROL MY EMOTIONS! I WILL NOT LET HER EFFECT THE WAY I LIVE MY LIFE OR MY DAILY ACTIVITIES. WHO THE FUCK CARES IF SHES IN KHARMA OR MY HOUSE! I RUN MY LIFE, ITS MY LIFE, ITS MY LIFE.....ITS MY LIFE.....I WILL NOT LET HER RUN MY LIFE ANYMORE! I WILL NOT ALLOW HER TO CONTROL ME! I WILL NOT ALLOW MY PAST TO EFFECT THE FUTURE! I WILL NOT ALLOW IT, ITS MY LIFE.....MY LIFE.....MY LIFE......ITS TIME I WAKE UP AND LIVE MY LIFE FOR ME AND NOT FOR OTHERS! MY LIFE IS MY LIFE, NOT HERS. ITS MY LIFE MY LIFE MY LIFE. I WILL NOT LET OLD FEELINGS THAT DONT HOLD ANY VALUE ANY MORE GET IN THE WAY OF MY LIFE.....ITS MY LIFE.....I DONT CARE WHO SHE SEES OR WHERE SHE GOES...ITS MY LIFE....I DONT CARE, ITS MY LIFE NOW, SHE DOES NOT CONTROL ME, SHE DOES NOT CONTROL MY THOUGHTS OR FEELINGS.....ITS MY LIFE!!

Wishful Dreaming

Dear Journal Readers,

Wow I guess its been almost a week since I last wrote in here. I guess with work and Joseph coming into town and such, I haven't had really been paying attention to this. Well how are you guys doing? Good I hope. I had this dream last night that I was dating this girl I know. Shes friends with my roommates and I hang out with her at Kharma sometimes. Anywayz, in my dream, after we had been dating for a while I realized that I was dreaming. When I told her that it was a dream she told me, "I dont care if this is a dream, you have to come find me. If this is a dream, what ever you do, come find me because we should be together." I called her twice today to hang out but no answer. I asked a friend and found out shes out of town right now anyway. Its dreams like that that make you wonder what dreams really are. I mean, how do I take that dream? Do I chalk it up to being just another weird odd dream or do I take it as a message to go out and do something about it? I for one am not taking the chance of it being a message and then not do anything about it. Yes it's probably just a silly dream, but damn it all, I'm going to find out. I know she's leaving for Baton Rouge in Aug, so even if a miracle happened and we ended up together or something it wouldn't last very long and even if it did it would be a long distance thing with no way I could ever come see her. Well, whatever then. Is it bad that I'm sitting here hoping I have that same dream again tonight? Why is it that lately, I seem to be happiest when I'm dreaming? I miss being happy when I am awake, like really happy. It's been a while since my awake happiness could match my dream happiness. I find comfort in thinking that maybe, just maybe, there is a girl out there right now sitting at her computer, typing in a journal entry and thinking t

4th of July

So.....Hi.....How are you doing? I'm doing alright. Tomorrow is the first Wednesday of the month which means that the new Superman comic comes out tomorrow. When I was at home this weekend for the 4th I brought up all my comics that I had stashed away. I had more than I thought I would honestly. So after work today I put them all in their little holders and put those into the binder. I surprisingly have a lot of the Reign of the Supermen series. I have enough to piece together the story line anyway. In other news, yesterday was the 4th of July so my family did our annual Kaboom Town trip in Addison. That was on the 3rd so when I got back up here on the 4th me, Josh, and Amy went to some ones house and had a crap load of food. While I was there I ran into a girl I knew named Shannon. I hadn't seen her since that X-Mas party I went to with the ex back in December. Of course, now that I'm single, she's not and neither was her TWIN SISTER who was also there. Go figure... Afterwards, us three, ashlee, sarah, and some other people went swimming in some pool somewhere in whcih Josh decided that he was going to be the only one to go skinny dipping. Most of everyone there had already seen him naked anyway. Work today was extreamly slow to start with but picked up towards the end. Son came up afterwards and we had lunch which was cool. Talked about Joseph maybe coming up this weekend which would be awesomeness. I wouldn't mind hanging out with him for a day or two. Also I bought my self some sun glasses today and thank God I did because its so damn hot and bright out now days. *Sigh* good ol' Texas Summers. Oh and to keep you up to speed on the Mac situation, upon advice from multiple people, I have decidied to hold off until I can 1) Save money and 2) wait for the system to get an upgrade here soon. Well ok thats about all for now.

Stupid job, Son's visit, and a new idea

Alright, another post to replace that long ass one I just wrote 3 days ago. So lets see...oh ya....work has really sucked these last few days. I've had shitty calls all week from people that cant just answer the damn question! And then when I try to answer them with a Pat Responce, I get in trouble for not using the right one?!?!? FUCK YOU!! URGGG......stupid job. Also in the bad news catagory, Shane has decided he is moving out which means that my rent just jumped back to $250 a month and oh ya, he "can't" p ay for this months rent even though he lived here the WHOLE TIME! AAAHHH! So good ridence to him. So you may be asking, alright Patrick, where is the good news? Well here have some good news...I bought the entire Death of Superman comic book series for $30 the other day. Thats about 7 comics I think and ya know what, it was soooo worth it. I always promised my self I would buy that comic book back after I was an idiot and traded it a long time ago when I use to have it. So I did....along with all the ones that lead up to it. Also in good news, I spent some time with Son tonight. He came up after work and we went to Applebee's. It was fun and good to hang out with him for a while. So I'm thinking about buying a Mac Mini. For those of you that dont know what that is, its a box mac that is 6.5'' by 2'' and is relatively low priced starting at $499. The basic box will get you a 40gig hard drive, 256 RAM, 1.25 G4 PowerPC, 9600 ati radion video card, and a combo dvd/cd drive. So it doesn't come with a monitor, keyboard or mouse, but I dont need it because I have a wireless keyboard and mouse that work with both so I'd just have to swhich monitors when I wanted to use the other. Also, I want to have the Mac burn dvds, so I'd need to upgrade to the Super Drive which brings the total up to like $540 or so. Now, I would never be able to afford this all at once with out saving for a few months on it...BUT...Apple has a deal where you can get this credit card, use it to buy your mac, then pay it off over a certain period of time. So, I could do that but do I really want to? Do I re ally need a Mac...no of course not...would it be helpful...yes. I would be using it for any multimedia application such as iTunes, Garage Band, iDVD, iMovie, iPhoto. which would handle all my music, pictures, videos and stuff which would free up a TON of room on my PC. In turn, my PC will continue to store my games, Microsoft Office programs (Word, Power Point, FrontPage), and probably email and AIM. So as you can see I would be using them both equally. Now Apple has this thing for students which is an Apple Credit Card that you can use to buy apple products then slowly pay them off with like an 11% interest rate which isn't to shabby. So I'd be paying about $15 a month for like....2 years. So....is it worth it?? I dont know, I'll have to think about it some more. Well thats about it for tonight.